Thursday, September 19, 2013

What to do with a broken heart?

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Okay we have all been there, we have all had our heartbroken to the point that it does not feel as if it will get better.  We pine for the man that we think we want, and feel like it is the end of the world.  But when you really think about it, what are we really upset for.  Are we upset that a man that we know did not want us in the first place broke up with us?  In that case, shouldn't we be happy that he kept us from making such a huge mistake in being with them.

What kills me about people and relationships is when they let it disrupt their entire way of life.  When they feel that suicide or being a side chick is the only answer to their break up.  I think the bigger picture here is that some people do not feel that they are worth more; they feel that there only option to a relationship is to beg and chase after someone that has told them they do see them as being the one.

From that point instead of moving on, we move to food, sex, drugs, alcohol, and everything in between to get our mind off of it.  Destroying our self instead of making our self better.  You may be asking yourself; well what do I do with a broken heart?  How do I pretend to be happy when everything in my soul is telling me to jump off a building?   I tell you this.  Broken hearts are not easy, but sitting there and thinking about how much your heart is broken or thinking about the person that broke your heart is not going to help. 
I think that it is okay to mourn for a little while.  By little while, I mean a week.  No everything will not be all better in a week.  But the days of you sitting on the couch, calling out from work, and eating ice cream all day should be over.  At some point you should get up, put on some clothing, make up, look great and get some fresh air.  Do not let the fact that one man did not want you; get you all in a bunch.

You need to adapt the attitude that it is there lost.  If someone is willing to pass your over, then why would want to be with them anyway.  Why would you want to be with anyone that did not appreciate your value and was willing to let you go?  I think after a break up, most of the reasons as to why we are upset are selfish. They are because that person was not the one, we have to start over, or they hurt your ego.  Nine times out of 10 before a break up when we really think about the relationship, it was not so peachy and cream anyway. 

Is it okay to have a broken heart?…yes.  It is not okay to be needy, making drunken calls to your ex, and beg for them to come back!  If they do not want you, then their lost.  Being needy does not make a man want to come back or make then realize what a mistake they made.  If they do not want to be with you, then they do not want to be with you.  Even if they did come back for your attention seeking antics, it would just be for pity, not because they really wanted to come back.

So if you have a broken heart, it’s time to put on your big girl panties and get over it.  Not gaining another 100 pounds, begging or pleading for the person to come back, or wondering what you did wrong.  At the end of the day it does not matter.  What matters is that the person from your past is not it.  So heal, move one, and learn whatever you need to learn.  Stop wondering why, because doesn't matter.  All that matters is your past is not your future, and the longer you linger on someone that is not it, the more you are prolonging the one that is.  So with every break up is a time to heal, but heal and move on, do not let one break up hinder you from growing. 

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