Tuesday, July 1, 2014

Being Single is Not A Death Sentence.

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Is it just me or does it seem like when you tell people you are single, they look at you as if you have just been diagnosed with a terminal illness.  It seems that my singleness bothers other people more than it bothers me.

I think even more so, is that after all that I accomplished or all that I seek to do, people do not see me as complete because I am 30, am not married, and not in a relationship.  This is mine blowing to me.  Especially since I am perfectly happy.  I have been through so many bad relationships or relationships with men I had no business being with, that my singleness is a welcomed changed.

I will admit, there was a time when I was single, that I felt depressed down and out and lonely. But then I realized two things.  The first is that when I have God I am never alone (see my blog here) and the second is if I cannot be happy on my own, then it is going to be very difficult for me to be happy with someone else (see my blog here).  After all, it is not other people that you should depend on for your happiness.

Once I grasp this concepts, I became quite content with being single.  Even more so, I focused on God and the path that He has for my life, and this makes me happy.  Not only that, but knowing God, helped me know what type of man to look for. Which is a man in His image.

Had I now known this information before, I would have settled for any “Joe” and had a bad marriage.  In fact, my relationships before finding out what God wanted for me, turned out to be more of a headache than they were worth.

So while other people feel that being single after 30 and even before thirty is a sign that you are going to be an old maid, I see it differently.

Being single is an opportunity to know myself, what I want out of a relationships, and a chance to get on my God given path.

It also gave me chance to mature and know what type of man was right me versus what type of man wasn’t.

Most importantly it made me realize and understand not to force relationships..  I can say that out of all the relationships I tried to force, none of them came out right.  Had I just trusted God and not gone about things on my own, I would have saved myself a lot of heartache.

Now I trust there is a man out there for me.  It could come now or 10 years from now.  Either way, I am not going to be sitting here in depression mode because I am single or not married.

Instead I am going to keep doing what I feel I was called to do on this Earth. I am going to keep on being a good mother weather my son has a father or not.  I am going to choose to be happy in my singleness.
This is a foreign concept to many of those who feel they NEED a husband, but follow my instruction and see where it gets you.  I can guarantee that once you get more content with yourself, that you will be happy no matter what your relationships status is.

If you want to read about my journey and see how I got so much peace about being single.  Get my book “ Waiting For A Man After God’s Own Heart.” Click on the “my book” tab, to get purchase information.  Read the first two chapters free through Amazon.