Submissiveness in a wife is something I felt lead to talk about. With the world the way it is today, people would like to lead Christians women into believing that submissiveness is a thing of the past. Before you women, get up in arms and stop reading. I would like to explain what submissiveness is and is not.
Being a submissive wife does not mean that you are going to be a maid, answering every little call of your husband.
It does not mean that you are going to be his share cropper, indentured servant, sex slave, or any other form of slavery.
It does not even mean that you have to agree with every little thing that comes out of his mouth.
You are a unique person, God made you this way. Submissiveness does not mean that you lose your personal identity and turn into a scene from the movie Coming To America. You know the one in the beginning where the prince was about to get married to his betrothed and the answer to all the princes questions were “ Whatever it is that you like.”
The prince did not like this about her in the movie and men won’t like it about you. No one wants a bobble head to say “ yes dear” to everything. So get that whole idea out of your head.
It is my personal opinion that no system can be effective if there are too many leaders. Everyone cannot want to be a leader in your household. This leads to utter chaos.
Let me explain it in a way that is easy to understand. We have a president this would be the equal to your husband. The president has the senate, congress, and all other type of systems to help him make informed decisions, but the president has the ultimate say so.
(Let’s not get into politics of what has or has not gone on with the president this is just an illustration).
The other government agencies would be the wife. Even through the president has the ultimate decision to make, he will always take the opinions of the other organization around him into consideration for the good of the people (your household, kids, etc).
This means if you are a wife or for single women who wish to become a wife. Your husband or future husband should not ignore your opinion and do whatever he wants to do weather it is good for the family or not. It means that when a decision is made, (this is why it is so important to choose a GOOD husband). He will made the decision based off of everyone needs and not just his own. Because at the end of the day, as a wife you must go with his decision.
Why? May you ask. Because if you have a opinion on how something must be done and your husband has another opinion. You will just keep going back and forth over and over again and nothing will get solved.
So one person needs to be the designated head of household and whatever he determines the decision is, as his wife you agree with it.
Let me pull out a Bible verse to give you a better understanding.
Ephesians 5: 28-29
“In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. After all, no one ever hated their own body, but they feed and care for their body, just as Christ does the church”
Do you see here? If a man loves you like he loves himself. He should not abuse your submissiveness and use it for weakness. No good, God fearing man should do that. A good husband should always treat his wife like himself, and if he does not want to hurt himself then he should not want to hurt his wife. Make sense?
So really being submissive should not be this dreadful thing you have to do because you feel that it is your obligation. For married women who have married a selfish man and he does not consider your feelings. Then under God’s law you still have to be submissive.
Go to God about it and pray that God speaks to his heart and change him.
For you single women, this is SO important what I am about to say. I do not want you to miss it. This is why knowing this as a single woman you are at an advantage. The reason being because you have to stop being SO DESPERATE to find a man that you remain objective.
When you met a man and get serious about him. Always look at how he treats you. If he is disrespectful and treats you like crap now, then he is not going to change when you two get married.
As a single you are still free to dump a loser or a non Godly man and make the right decision to choose someone that God would chose for you.
For myself I am highly opinionated and independent. I am sure it will play against me no doubt when I get married. This is why I must be very careful in understanding the type of man that I want to submit to. I want to submit to a man that respects my opinions and honors them as oppose to just disregards them and does what he wants to do.
Think about it.
Thursday, July 24, 2014
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