Do you struggle with being content in your singleness?
In all honestly I used to. I used to struggle a lot with being single, so much so that I think it kind of compromised my mental state a little bit. This is because I was not able to have a realistic point of view on relationships and made the idea of a relationship more than what it was more like an idol.
Now I am content on being single (see my blog here on how I got that way). I think I have come to learn that I should not desire anything more than I desire God. I learned that if I am doing what I feel I am called to do in life and with my relationship with God, then I am content with being single. I learned to be more complete on my own and not expect another person to complete me. This was a big lesson that I learned and how I got to be so content with being single.
What do you see as your role in finding a husband?
I do not feel that it is my role to find my husband. I feel like “he who finds a wife finds a good thing” (see my blog here) not the other way around. With this being said I do feel there are some things I can do to prepare myself for a husband. This includes being emotionally stable, knowing myself, and knowing what to recognize in a future husband. I think preparation is the main role that I have when finding a husband, not necessarily to go out and chase one down. I think that if I am in the right place in my life, my husband will find me.
How do you deal with sexual urges and temptations?
Well a big push for me to fight my sexual urges was when I went through a situation with a man in which I got played out in a big way (see my blog here). From there on it made me reevaluate what sex was really for and I got an understanding on how having sex outside of marriage sets me up to be used and abused my men. Now I try not to put myself in situations where I would be tempted. Also, I have cut way back on dating. The temptation is not that great when you do not have people around to be tempted by .
How do you keep from feeling isolated, especially at church?
I do not felt isolated at church. I go to a pretty mixed church. There are single people and there are married people. Sometimes people my age or younger announce that they are getting married or I see them getting married , and then I feel a little isolated, but for the most part those situations are very far and few.
As for in my personally life. I tend to keep myself busy. I am not busy just for the sake of keeping myself busy so that I do not feel lonely, but I am not doing it for that reason. I am doing things because I feel that God wants me to do them as well as to further my career and to provide security for my son.
I am getting a PhD, blogging, have a job, and even more. So I try to keep myself busy so I am do not get into a place where I feel like I am wallowing in self pity about being single. I keep myself busy so I feel like I am always moving forward.
These are the answers to my question. I would love to hear your answers as well.