Saturday, July 26, 2014

Am I Too Picky? Or Are You Just Refusing To Accept Nonsense?

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I am 30 years old and single.  I have heard so many times that the reason why I am still alone is because I am too picky.  It seems that the conversation I have with most women, is they just find a man and it does not really matter weather they love them or not.

This is a new concept to me, but apparently everyone woman on the planet seems to think they can look past not loving someone and still want to marry them.  As I spoke to a friend of mine who had been married before, she told me the next time she was going to get married, that she was going to get married for love.

This confused me, I wanted to ask her why did she get married the first time?  It does not really make sense to be married to someone you do not love, seeing as how you expect to spend the rest of you life with them and all.

Some of my criteria for a man include him having a job, being a Christian, me being attracted to him, his own place, commonsense, intelligent, a good person, and a good role model.

I do not feel these things are picky, I feels these things are completely normal.  Why would I want to have someone with no job, no money, and someone who cheats on me all for the sake to say I am with someone?

I will give you a real life example.  I once met a guy, a lawyer in fact.  He offered that we workout in the morning before work.  That morning when I came over to his home, he did not answer the phone.  I could not get up to his apartment because it had a code.

Therefore I did what any normal woman would do at 6 am who came to meet someone.  I waited until someone else went in and then I came in behind them.

When I knocked on his door, the man was shocked to see me.  He asked how I got in because the building was suppose to be locked.  After about 20 minutes of sitting in his apartment waiting for him to get ready, his alarm goes off, for him to wake up.

In case you do not know what this means, let me explain it to you.  He had no intentions of meeting me.  He set his alarm for a good 40 minutes after I was supposed to meet him.  His plan the whole time was to have me waiting outside his building until I went away.   In the back of my mind, I knew I would never see this man again.

When I got to work I told my tale to a co-worker.  She explained to me that because I wanted to get marred I should not make a big deal about this, and accept the fact that he basically attempted to stand me up.

I looked at her in much bewilderment.  I took time out of my schedule to get up early to meet this man so that we could go running downtown (he lived near where I worked).  This man could not even respect me enough to get up out of his bed and keep his word to me.  And it was intentional!

This ladies is not being picky.  This is expecting someone to be respectful to you and keep their word (read my blog here on keeping your word).

Since when did expecting a man to be respectful to you, mean that you have high expectations?  And what is worse, when did women start to feel that expecting a man to keep his word, have a job, and take you out on a date was too high.

I am not willing to let anyone tell me that I am too picky.  I feel that this is what men tell you to make you feel bad about yourself so that they can get away with crap!

The crazy thing is I could go on and on and tell you date after date and story after story when men try to run game just to get you to think they are something special when they are not.

Man know that woman want to get married, and so they use it against us.  They try to convince us that we should accept the breadcrumbs they throw out because we are the ones in need of their attention.

My ex, tried to get back with me once, or a few times. Or he just wanted sex, who knows.  When I told him we were just on two separate we were in two separate books all together.  He told me there were so many women that had it together but not many men like him.  And therefore I should be lucky that he shows me any attention.  SAY  WHAT!

Let’s recap on my relationship with him, he cheated, did nothing around the home (we lived together), did not pay rent, bills, crashed his car and used mine (sometimes without permission).  And even though he was in a better place in life now, what on Earth would make me want to go back to nonsense.  What is he smoking !!!

And what is worse, is that me saying no, was somehow shocking to him.  Because women are supposed to accept anything.

I know this was a bit of a rant, but my point is.  Do not let anyone tell you, you are too picky.  If there is a certain type of man you want, then wait until you get him.  Do not sell all for the sake of being married and spending the rest of your life with someone who thinks you are lucky to be with him.

It should be the opposite, if he really loves you, he should be thinking that he is lucky to be with you.  Women you are not too picky.  It is just time for men to step their game up and stop being little babies who want to live off of us, hurt us, do what they want to do, and tell us that we should accept it because at least we have a man.

In closing, if you want to hear more about my relationships mayhem.  Read about it in my book.  Click below for more info.