The topic of being modest is something that I have grown to be passionate about, especially among Christian women. When I speak of modestly I do not feel that you have to be dressed in a turtle neck with your arms and elbows covered. I could not promote anyone to be that way because I am not the way.
However, I do feel that one should be respectable. Meaning clothing that shows your nipples, butt cheeks, and vaginal lips should be out of your wardrobe.
The Bible teaches us
“Likewise also that women should adorn themselves in respectable apparel, with modesty and self-control.” 1 Timothy 2:9
This theory all depends on how on how your outside is perceived. If your outside is showing too much men are not going to want to get to know your inside, they are simply just going to want to have sex with you.
I understand that you want to be desirable to the opposite sex, but revealing too much is sending the wrong message. It is not sending the “ Get to know me, I could be a future wife” message.
It is sending the “Come and sleep with me and my body is all I have to offer” message.
Showing too much has become popular culture ( read my blog here to read more of what I mean by this). What a women should want is to attract a good man, and what you wear can say a lot about what you want to attract.
Even after you meet a man and go out on a date, you would like for him to not be so distracted by your protruding nipples that he forgets to get to know you. You never want your first date to be focused mainly on sex. If you dress with most of your body hanging out, this is the exact message that you are going to throw out.
One thing that you do not want to do as a Christian women, is to cause a man to lust after you. You are not only distracting his mind, but down playing your own virtues.
For myself, even though I like looking nice, the last thing I want a man to just see me for is a sex object that is for his own pleasure. You want him to feel like you have something to offer. For women looking for marriage, you want him to see you as a future wife and mother of his children.
Being wide open with your wardrobe is going to prevent him from thinking this. I am convinced that men think in very rationale way. They are going to think “ If I have a daughter with this woman, am I going to want my daughter to dress or be like her?”
Always keep this in your mind frame when you are deciding what to where. There are plenty of ways that you can look nice and in style without looking like a nun. When you learn to not flaunt your body so openly, it forces you to begin to attract men with your personality and your mind. Isn’t this what you want anyway?
To have a man respect you for you and not because they think you are easy.
After all, we all get older, with children your body and breast change. Finding a man that loves you for you, will guarantee that he will be able to stick with you through your imperfect stage.
Let a man fall in love with the real you and not for your body. You need to understand, how to learn the difference. Some men get off on marrying women who look like a Barbie doll so he can show her off to all of his friends. If this is what you want, then by all means. But you have to understand that if you get older, gain weight, or do not want to dress tiny little clothes any more, you run the risk running them away or them trading you in for a newer model.
If a man just wants you because you wear short skirts and even smaller shirts, then they are just stuck on appearance. They are only going to do what is best for them so when they see something better or when they feel you can’t pull off the look, then out you go.
These type of things happens all the time. It should tell you how deep their love is for the woman, if they no longer feel she can be their arm candy. They are not in love with a woman like this, they are in love with themselves and only want the woman because she makes them look good.
In short, be modest. Have respect for yourself and your body. What you have does not need to be shown to whole world. You may not get as much attention, but you will get quality attention from the right type of men who you know want you for you and not your body.
My definition of modestly may not fit the traditional view. But I feel as long as you look respectable to yourself and others, then you are find.
Check out looks I have chosen for Chic Modestly. Looking Good while still covering up.