Saturday, July 5, 2014

Thou Shall Not Covet Other People's Relationships, Because They Suck!

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For those people who are not content in their singleness, I was once like you.  But I am going to tell you something I learned over the years about people who married, many of them hate it!

I use to always covet people relationships, thinking they were so blessed because they were married or because they had this type of man.  But God was great in showing me that everything that glitters is certainly not gold.  Let me just give you a short list of problematic things I saw in others people marriage.

A friend of mine was set to get married to a man who made six figures. While on the outside, it looked like she had it all.  He whined her, dined her, bought her whatever she wanted.  I soon found out that he had a creepy fetish that consisted of him pimping her out to random men.  He would get off on seeing her have sex with others.  With this knowledge that quickly subsided my envy. Under no circumstance would I ever want my man to feel like it was okay to share me with others.

A  few of my married friends as husband or wives, their spouses committed adultery This is actually more common than one would think in both men and women, even among Christians. In some cases, husbands would actually come on to me.  If they were so faithfully and committed as they appeared to be, then why are they stepping outside of they marriage.

Some marriages I have observed, one person in the relationships was just not right.  Either they had a compulsive lying problems, sex addiction, was too needy, too attention seeking, had to much of an attitude, complained to much, spend to much, was lazy, had sexual dysfunctions, has STD’s they brought into the relationship, had STD’s they got while married, got other people pregnant, and this is just to name a few.

I do not think I could list the extent of marital problems I have seen and how many of them regret it. I have come to learn that so many single people fantasize about getting married.  However, what is it that you are really fantasizing about?

Is it the wedding?  Is it financial security?  The need for not being alone? The fact that you are getting older? That you want kids? What is it?

The fact that you desire these things are fine and normal, but let me ask you, are you willing to just find anybody in order to satisfy these desires in yourself?  Once the wedding is over you have the rest of your life to spent with that person. If you find a millionaire are you willing to be with him and have him cheat on you with 20 different women?  If you want children are you willing to chose someone who is not going to be a good father to your children all for the sake of not being alone?

Getting married goes beyond what you desire, it is about finding someone you feel you can spend the rest of your life with, without feeling like you want to:

Put yourself out of your misery by jumping of off a bridge.


 Put your spouse out of their misery by stabbing them in their sleep.

I can assure you most people want a relationships that lasts.  Therefore, take a chill pill relax and wait for the right one as oppose to just anyone.

I use to be that needy desperate woman until some sense got knocked into me.  Check out my book here.

My Other Suggested Blogs On This Topic

How To Spot Mr. Wrong                             God,  I'm Lonely 
Being Single Is Not  A Death Sentence       
Being Married To God                                  Stop Chasing Men 
Be Single Be Happy                                      Women Know Your Worth
Every man Does not Deserve Your Time